My Asshole Kid

Today, as we left the grocery store:

The Boy: Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about women. Show them the pretty face, and they love you. I’m doing better than you, Dad.

Me: Over quite a few more years, I’ve learned quite a bit more about women. The pretty face will only get you so far. Then comes the crazy.

Note that there was a slight pause between what he said and what I said, as he recovered from a throat punch.