My Diseased Mind

Point/Counterpoint With Joboo

Unedited, typos and all:

Joboo says:
Although some may argue that throwing it across your shoulder is putting it a little to close to the mouth.

M says
I hate to ruin anyone’s opinion of me, but if I could get it to my mouth, I would. That doesn’t make me gay; it makes me lucky.

M says
Oh sure, be that way. Pretend like you would put your own cock in your mouth if you could do it. Luckily for you, we’ll never know.

M says
*wouldn’t.

Joboo says:
Dude, penis in mouth = gay.

M says
Not if it’s yours.

Joboo says:
Yep. Hate to break it to you.

M says
Let’s say you’re eating barbecue with a male friend. You’d lick barbecue sauce off of your fingers, but not his, right?

Joboo says:
Hello. Fingers.

Joboo says:
Not dick.

M says
But if they were HIS fingers, it’d be gay.

Joboo says:
Weird & very possibly gay, but not 100% certain gay.

M says
Nope, it’d be 100% gay.

M says
100% weirdly gay.

M says
Your fingers=not gay.

M says
Putting anything of yours into your mouth isn’t gay. Putting anything of another guy’s is.

M says
Here’s a manlaw commercial I’d really like to see. Mainly because I’m curious as to which side of the issue Bettis comes down on.

Joboo says:
Pretty much, but there are entenuating circumstances.

Joboo says:
If he’s snake bit & you have to suck out the poison, it would be OK to suck on his leg or arm. If he’s bit on the johnson & you suck out the poison, you’re gay.

M says
I agree, but if you’re bored and could suck your own, you’re not gay.

M says
I mean, don’t swallow or anything like that, but dude, it’s a free blowjob.

Joboo says:
And it means your gay.

M says
Nope. Only if you happen to already be gay.

Joboo says:
What does it matter then if you can blow yourself or not? You would already be gay because you’re a tonsil jockey. Which you would be too if you could blow yourself meaning you would be gay.

Joboo says:
Gay gay gay, gay gay gay gay gay, gay, gay gay gay gay gay. Gay!

M says
It’s starting to smell a little bit insecure here.

M says
You don’t gotta be jealous; I can’t reach.

Joboo says:
I can’t help it if you ain’t flexible enough.

M says
If it’s all the same to you, I wasn’t asking for hlep.

M says
*help even.

M says
Thanks though.

Joboo says:
Oh, I think you are. But this cowboy don’t travel that road.

M says
Nope, with another guy is gay.

Joboo says:
You’re just rationalizing your desire to try it out. Don’t do it man.

M says
You’re lumping all cocks into one pile. This one’s my cock. Next you’re gonna tell me that I can’t yank it either.

M says
And those will be fightin’ words.

M says
I was gonna go take a piss, but OH NOS! THERE’S A COCK IN MY HAND!

Joboo says:
Someone is obsessing.

M says
Just proving my point.

Joboo says:
And as far as yanking it goes, I defer to Woody Allen.

M says
You’d let Woody Allen yank your johnson?

M says
Dude, that’s gay.

Joboo says:
Masturbation is just sex with someone I love.

M says
So’s autofellatio!

M says
I’m glad this didn’t get weird.

Joboo says:
Not at all.

Joboo says:
What were we talking about?

Joboo says:
That’s right, baseball.

M says
Sucking our own cocks.

M says
I mean baseball.

Joboo says:
Same thing.

M says
I’m totally watching baseball wrong.

Joboo says:
Who said anything abour watching it?

M says
I see what you did there!

M says
So seriously, do we hug now, or what?

Joboo says:
Not even mentally.

M says
C’mon… hug it out bitch.

Joboo says:
OK. Just let me move my wang out of the way first.

M says
Careful not to get it near your mouth. Or use your hands. Is it OK to use the force? Lucky fuckin’ Jedi.

Joboo says:
Yep. The force would be acceptable hetro behavior.

Joboo says:
Now where’s my robe.

M says
See, now that’s where I take the other argument. Capes and high leather boots? Gay.

Joboo says:
A jedi could wear a leather bustier & butt plug if they want.

Joboo says:
They’re so bad it don’t matter.

M says
Only one smoov lady’s man i nthe galaxy could pull off that look. Lando.

M says
And you heard the way Yoda talks. Such an old queen.